Every time I use my GPS I want to write a blog entry about what it says. All the language is just dripping with analogies. Before I left for Europe, I had a dream that I got into a taxi in some ambiguous European city that could be any European city. The cab driver didn't know how to get where I wanted to go, so I took my GPS out of my purse and let him use it. But then, after he dropped me off, I realized that he still had my GPS. I started running after the cab, screaming after him, "Wait! You have my GPS! Please come back! How will I know where to go?" He didn't hear me, and eventually I became exhausted from running. I collapsed into a breathless pile of tears and frustration on the European sidewalk, repeating, "How will I know where to go?" to myself over and over until I woke up.
So now my GPS says, "Prepare to turn left in point seven miles." Thank you GPS. "Prepare to get divorced." What? "Prepare to be lonely." Wait a second. "Prepare to question every decision you make for the rest of your life and to live an unsure existence, constantly searching for human companionship where the benefits of intimacy outweigh the annoyances of coexistence."
Where was my GPS for that?
5 comments:
Sometimes when I don't comment, it's not because I'm not reading (I'm sure it's that way for others too), I'm just sad and don't know what to say, but I am here...
Dittos and more dittos to what Sarah Mae wrote above! You know I'm reading too, and here for you.
*********HEY, ALL YOU OTHER READERS, LET'S SHOW MELANIE THAT YOU SUPPORT HER TOO AND THAT SHE IS NOT ALONE IN HER STRUGGLES, EVEN IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY EITHER! ********
There IS a light at the end of this tunnel, honey... and the next one... and the next one. Life is a roller coaster of ups and downs, but you are not alone in your walk through it all. Just open your eyes and heart and see all the help that is "out there", and within your own heart too.
Thanks for your little electronic support bytes ladies. I'm pretty sure you two and the handful of people (mostly mom's friends) who email me are my only blog readers. It's ok. You don't have to rally people to give me chin-up advice. I know every cloud has a silver lining and there's a light at the end of this tunnel and it takes rain to make a rainbow and blah blah blah. I'm just trying to open my arms, lift my face up, and breathe in life as it comes. I'm not trying to make it any rosier or any cloudier than it comes to me. I just want it straight up. Right now, straight up just happens to be rather shitty. Eh, so goes life.
By the way, you're profile has received 300 views, so we are not the only ones reading!
Sorry, me again! When we talking when you were here visiting I was telling you a little bit about Margaret Sanger and Planned Parenthood - check out my blog to learn more about her. Everything is straight from her own words.
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